Q: Describe yourself in five words?

Doorwarden: Doors, Doorframes, Doorways, Door-handles... Robot.

Q: What's your favourite colour?

Doorwarden: I think most of the doors in here are greyish or brownish.

Q: So your favourite colour is greyish-brownish?

Doorwarden: Yes.

Q: Favourite number?

Doorwarden: About eight-and-a-half million, because last time one of us tried to count, I think that's how many doors there were in the Fort.

Q: What do you miss most from your life before Fort Paradox?

Doorwarden: I didn’t have a life before Fort Paradox.

Q: What do you enjoy most about life on board Fort Paradox?

Doorwarden: So many exciting doors to stand next to!

Q: What would your perfect day be like?

Doorwarden: 24 hours standing next to a really big door.  And opening the door, and closing the door.  And saying hello to people who come through the door when I open it.

Q: No signs of clinical obsession going on here, are there...  Next question: where would you most like to visit?

Doorwarden: All the doors I haven’t stood next to yet!

Q: Definitely no signs of obsession.  And finally: do you have any interests which don’t involve doors?

Doorwarden: Should I?